when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
