Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
