my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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