problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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