What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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