I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
