omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
