i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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