Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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