Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
