You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
