this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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