ADVERTISEMENT

• (207): View more from Maine

  watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food

  Fav 32 1306 2346

  share tweet
  

• (804): View more from Virginia

  It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand

  Fav 2 1036 2578

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.

  Fav 9 5212 1503

  share tweet
  

• (765): View more from Indiana

  So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?

  Fav 16 5289 1936

  share tweet
  
• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (204): View more from Manitoba

  Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself

  Fav 9 1297 4037

  share tweet
  

• (516): View more from New York

  I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.

  Fav 14 3076 1063

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (530): View more from California

  So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?

  Fav 10 1645 816

  share tweet
  

• (940): View more from Texas

  I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.

  (254): View more from Texas

  It's 2 pm....

  Fav 3 2137 748

  share tweet
  

• (817): View more from Texas

  A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10

  Fav 2 831 534

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (707): View more from California

  Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.

  Fav 14 464 920

  share tweet
  

• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..

  Fav 1 461 643

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.

  Fav 4 1063 509

  share tweet
  

• (503): View more from Oregon

  I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.

  Fav 3 536 160

  share tweet
  

• (250): View more from British Columbia

  yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand

  Fav 0 78 7

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.

  Fav 1 55 12

  share tweet
  

Randomize