The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
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