why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
