im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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