Its about making memories worth repressing
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
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