think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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