Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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