I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize