Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
