Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
