you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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