Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
