so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
