Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize