so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
