My brain says no but my pants say off.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
