I can feel you judging me through the phone.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
