My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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