he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.