margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
North Korea, Best Korea!
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
