So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
