areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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