How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Congratulations! We have a period
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