why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
God I need to hump something, right now.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
