bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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