Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize