you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize