Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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