Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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