belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My first STD was from a foam party
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Randomize
