Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
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Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
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We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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