Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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