New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
There's always time for handjobs
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
