OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I cockslap morals
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
