i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
