i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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