i don't like sucking hair
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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