Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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