I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize
